Linus Smallprint

@hybridlore   @linus-smallprint    @koshka   @keilah-h    @elishavet-pidyon   @grcr

ALTERNATE NEXT SECTION!!!!!

Please be honest as y’all read this, because saving the boys is going to be a HUGE change. However, I think it may be the right one, and some interesting things happened that makes me think so. However, I am still on the edge, a…[Read more]

@linus-smallprint

Hmm. I guess I was trying to cross over the LTBL goal into this without clearly stating that. It’s hard, because Joseph has a tendency to lean toward a survival mindset (no one can really blame him) and the story is his POV.

UGH, I can see the Eric thing both ways. I could still use his almost death as a “wakeup call” and it…[Read more]

@theducktator

Not yet, I should though.

@keilah-h

That’s a good response, I feel like that’s hard to do sometimes though when human minds constantly want answers.

@raxforge

This definitely did help, thanks.

@linus-smallprint

Thanks, those are interesting points.

@power

You’re right, the devil is kind of overrated when compared to God’s…[Read more]

@linus-smallprint

@hybridlore wants me to save Eric.

What are your thoughts?

@linus-smallprint

Yes!!! Stripe got hugged!!!! I’m glad the crow showed up again. I’d almost forgotten about them.

It’s destination was the capital, Pryde.

That should be Its, without the apostrophe.

@linus-smallprint

I sure don’t enjoy it.

Do you think it’s fine as long as this is the last one……. (for a while.)

@linus-smallprint

Kind of. I did get a little hope, but when the mood switched I thought, “Okay. Here we go again. Do we have to be here for this?”

Oh.

I thought you said to go ahead and kill them.

Do you think it wasn’t good?

@linus-smallprint

i think so. He’s in the barn talking to martha

@linus-smallprint

Hmm, wow, must have really sobered you. No comment on the amount of exclamation marks. lol. After I posted it, I looked back and was like, “wow, there’s a lot.” lol.

And no comment on the fact that I offed Joseph’ best friends.

Ah. So there was a positive event in there. This is what you were referring too.

Yes, and I have a…[Read more]

@linus-smallprint

Maybe. This is a question I will ask at the end, but so far, what would the top scenes that you would like to see illustrations for be?

Ooo, I haven’t thought of this really.

Okay. well, the Stripe one of course. That would be super funny/cute, especially with his ears flat. lol.

Maybe one of Martha and Alan talking. I would…[Read more]

@linus-smallprint

As for the actual plot of everything, I really like what you did with the crow there. Ties in nicely. I’m curious as to what the king’s doing. Is he trying to help Alan? It may be that because he was interested in Alan’s success, he ordered the arrests of the Faithful in order to get rid of one of the wizard’s obstacles. But…[Read more]

@hybridlore   @linus-smallprint    @koshka   @keilah-h    @elishavet-pidyon   @grcr

NEXT SECTION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Joseph sat at the table and stared at his plate. Noah and Darrien had already eaten and were pulling on their boots. They knew the hard day of work they had ahead, and they had been able to eat

Sabina put her arm over Joseph’s sh…

[Read more]

@linus-smallprint

Yippy! Stripe was HUGGED!!!!

AWWWWW! it was soooooo cute!!!!!! Now you have to draw a picture of it!!!

Aside from Stripe being hugged, I really enjoyed the chapter.I’m glad you brought the crow back in. I was wondering how long it would be before you tied that part of the plot back into the story.

Also, one…[Read more]

@linus-smallprint

YEEEESSSS!!!!!

STRIPE HAS BEEN HUGGED!!!!

*does a happy dance*

@ellette-giselle

Ok, I will say that I enjoyed how it was carried off in this section. I agree with what @linus-smallprint said about that. It reminded me of The Healer by Dee Henderson. (A book about facing the grief of a broken world.) Very good.

What I say is redundant is the fact that it feels like more characters are dying than those who…[Read more]

@linus-smallprint

thanks so much for this feedback.

im not going to say anything so as not to shed light on which path i take, but i will say that it was extremely helpful knowing your thoughts.

thanks again!

@linus-smallprint

Why was I expecting this to be something positive?

You should know me better than that.

It kind of made the event feel like a slap. (Ouch. I’m feeling Josephs pain.)

Perfect! That’s exactly what I wanted.

It also feels more tragic because of how casually Eric and Asher headed out. It was just a normal day.

Ah yes. Poor b…[Read more]

@hybridlore   @linus-smallprint    @koshka   @keilah-h    @elishavet-pidyon   @grcr

NEXT SECTION

Sorry it’s so short.

Joseph woke. For a long moment he lay, trying to figure out what was happening and where he was. He had been so exhausted he didn’t even remember lying down. There was an odd sound, a sound he knew he had heard many times be…

[Read more]

@hybridlore   @linus-smallprint    @koshka   @keilah-h    @elishavet-pidyon   @grcr

WARNING:

There has been a change in the rapid time jump. It is now a bigger time jump, and Joseph is 19. Sorry about the whiplash any of y’all are experiencing after that. lol.

NEXT SECTION!!

“Joseph, do you think the gates will ever open?”

Asher…

[Read more]

@linus-smallprint

I’ll try to send something in as soon as I finish formatting my magazine and get it sent out. I’m almost done!!!!!!